


Here comes the heat (before we meet a little bit closer)

by Green98



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Babies, Confusion, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Happy, Heartbreak, Hiding, Love Confessions, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-28
Updated: 2018-06-28
Packaged: 2019-05-29 22:57:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15083552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Green98/pseuds/Green98
Summary: Lena wants a baby. She would rather conceive her own child but the list of sperm donors she received were more than a little disappointing and as a proud lesbian she is not interested in a boyfriend. That leaves her with adoption which she doesn't have a problem with she just thinks it sad that she won't be able to experience the pregnancy side of parenthood.What happens when she tells Kara? Not what anybody expects to happen that's for sure.OrLena wants a baby. Kara is happy for Lena but after a little thinking not every goes as planned and things take a shaky turn.





	Here comes the heat (before we meet a little bit closer)

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first fic in 3rd person. I know it's probably terrible, I've never attempted writing in 3rd person before so I apologise for all of the mistakes and if it doesn't make complete sense. 
> 
> If you do get confused, just ask me in the comments and I will answer as best as I can.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

Lena decides she wants a child. She's thought about it for a few months now and she has made up her mind. She received her adoption application form today and just as she is about to fill it out she is interrupted by Alex Danvers. The older danvers sister must have finished her notes on the new prototype they are working on together and has come to give her a the files to look over and finish.

As Alex hands Lena the files she notices the adoption application form on the youngest Luthors desk.

"You're looking to adopt?" She asks curiously. Having adopted herself, she may be able to offer support if Lena wants it.

Lena blushes a little at Alex's question but confidently explains that she want to become a mother.

"I am only getting older and Alex, I am finally comfortable in my job and no longer have to worry about my life being in danger due to my mother dying and I was informed a few days ago that Lex has lost the mental capacity to even remember his own name let alone mine so...

The doctors have estimated him to have about one month, before his brain deteriates to the point of my brother cannot even lift his own body parts. It's sad really, he could have been such a brilliant man if only he didn't have a mother like Lillian pushing him towards evil and manipulating him like a puppet. I hate that that is my brothers fate but I also feel relieved at being able to live my life without worrying about his threats. Anyway, I'm digressing," The youngest Luthor explains that she would have loved to conceive her own baby and experience being pregnant but none of the donors that she was provided to choose from were... well they were disappointing. She also doesn't want a boyfriend. Which leaves her with adoption, which of course she doesn't have an issue with considering she was adopted herself.

Being a lesbian herself Alex understands why Lena is not interested in the boyfriend route but she thinks to herself that Lena doesn't necessarily need a boyfriend. She needs a Kara.  
  
With that thought in mind, Alex smirks at Lena.  
  
"You're in love with Kara aren't you?" She asks abruptly.   
  
Lena pauses at the sudden loaded question and swallows thickly, she nods her head once and Alex continues knowingly.  
  
"I thought so. You should talk to my sister, Lena." Alex says.  
  
Lena looks at the agent in confusion.  _Why should she talk to Kara? About what?_  
  
Alex just shakes her head feigning annoyance. "Talk to Kara, Lena." Alex repeats and then leaves smiling again.  
  
_Kara has always wanted to become a mother. She has always wanted children. Kara is also in love with Lena just as Lena is in love with Kara - and they both want children_ Alex thinks to herself as she rides the elevator to the bottom floor.  
  
_Lena would like to have a child of her own but is settling for adoption_ and Alex knows that she would love the adopted child no differently to one of her own, but Alex also knows that Kara could give Lena a child of her own so that she could have the full experience of motherhood and then maybe adopt later.  
  
If Lena tells Kara that she wants a child, Alex knows that Kara, being her over thinking self would easily figure that out and maybe, just maybe, Kara will finally tell Lena how she feels and then she can also explain that she can get Lena pregnant naturally, and Lena being the genius that she is should quickly realise that Kara is the solution to both of her wants and needs.

It could be that easy... but when is anything ever easy?

* * *

Lena doesn't call Kara to talk like Alex told her she should. She doesn't need to, the blonde is bringing take-out to her apartment later and they are going to watch movies like they usually do on Friday evening's. So until 6pm comes around Lena stresses over what Alex told her to do, "Talk to Kara".  
  
Lena thinks that Alex meant about the adoption thing and comes to the conclusion that she actually would like the reporters opinion. Maybe she could offer Lena her support and she could definitely use her optimism.  
  
However, the longer she thinks about it, Alex also called her out on her feelings for Kara so maybe she meant she should talk to her about that and not the adoption like the first thought... or that she should talk about both.  
  
Lena isn't sure she is ready for Kara to reject her just yet and if she's to get through this adoption she will need her bestfriend for a little longer. Hell, she will always need Kara but if Kara leaves, Lena will respect her decision no matter how much it hurts her.  
  
6 o clock finally arrives and so does the bubbly blonde along with their food. Lena greets Kara with a fond smile and a far too brief hug and they choose to sit in front of the tv and eat their dinner whilst they discuss their day to each other.

Once they are both finished Lena decides that she is ready now to tell Kara about wanting to adopt a child and now seems like a decent time to do it.  
  
"Hey, so there is something that I have been wanting to tell you," Lena starts confidently although it doesn't take long for her nerves to kick in.  
  
They ease slightly when Kara moves to sit next to Lena with a soft, easy smile that help the usually confident CEO to continue.  
  
As she stares at her tangled fingers Lena continues, "I er... I have been thinking about adopting a child," Lena says and bites her lip. She glances up to gauge Kara's reaction and the blonde is still smiling at her.  
  
"Lena, that's great!" She says and pulls Lena into a hug. After a moment she pulls away again and Lena continues.  
  
"Obviously I would very much love to carry a child of _my own_ but none of the sperm donors profiles that were provided to me were exactly anything... well, I wasn't impressed and I don't have a male partner nor do I want one so... Adoption is my last option,"

Lena explains, she looks back down at her hands awkwardly and doesn't see the way Kara's face scrunches up in thought, _I could give you a child_ , she thinks but she quickly pushes that to the back of her mind before Lena turns back to her and schools her face as best she can so that she is smiling again.  
  
"Mhmm," Kara hums.  
  
They don't move away from each other after that, they put on Grown Ups, one of Kara's favourite movies but her mind kept wandering back to how she could get Lena pregnant if she wanted her to, then Lena can experience the whole process of having a child herself like Lena admitted she would have liked to do if she had of found a suitable donor.  
  
As Kara thinks about Lena wanting a child more and more she thinks that maybe she coulr offer to donate for Lena but then she decides that no, she couldnt because she wouldn't want to just be a donor. If she impregnated Lena she would want to be there to help raise him or her as the child's other parent, and Rao, she would want to be in an official relationship with Lena so that they could be a proper family.  
  
Kara notices that Lena is looking at her with a concerned expression.  
  
"Everything okay? Do you need to go be Supergirl?" Lena asks as Kara meets her eyes. Kara's brain tells her to say 'yes'.  
  
"Unfortunately yeah," Kara says with a sigh and pushes herself up from Lena's comfortable sofa.  
  
She hates that she is lying to Lena but she can't stop thinking about the child thing and then she can't stop thinking about how she wants to be with Lena and then that leads to her thinking about a family with Lena, but then she remembers that Lena probably doesn't feel the same way about her that she feels about Lena. So before she can panic in front of Lena _about_ Lena and cause the woman more worry she decides she needs to go and see Alex and Sam for help.  
  
She quickly kisses Lena on the cheek and then flies as fast as she can to Alex and Sam's apartment. She makes sure to knock on the window because Rao, she has seen far more of her sister and her sister doing certain activities than she ever needed to so she doesn't let herself just walk in anymore, no matter the situation.  
  
Thankfully they weren't doing anything, Alex opened the window with a happy smile but her eyes show that she was slightly confused as to her sisters random visit. Not that she minded.  
  
"So Kara, to what do we owe the pleasure?" Sam asks as Kara takes her usual seat on the sofa.  
  
Kara looks down at her hands nervously, Sam and Alex just give each other knowing looks but wait patiently for Kara to explain.  
  
"Uh, well, Lena told me that she is planning to adopt a child- and that's great! I-I'm really happy for her... but then she told me that she would prefer t-to have her own but she didn't like any of the sperm donors profiles and that she didn't want a male partner so adoption is her last option," Kara trails off awkwardly.  
  
"O-kay...? So you're not on board with Lena's choice?" Sam says confused as to why Kara seems to be worried or upset about that. Of course Sam understands that it sucks Lena won't get to experience being pregnant but there's nothing Kara can do about that.  
  
Kara looks up slowly and even more confused than Sam is. She looks to Alex but Alex just shrugs looking also confusedly at Sam.  
  
"You know that I'm in love with Lena right...? So I could give Lena a baby and help-" Sam cuts Kara off.  
  
"You're a woman... how can you- oh do you have a- sorry okay I think I understand," Sam says and embarrassed flush colouring her cheeks.  
  
Kara gives Alex an incredulous _"Does she not know!?"_ look and then faces Sam again.  
  
"Um, I don't have a- uh, I don't have a penis Sam... Kryptonians, you and I, we uh- Sam we can reproduce in same sex relationships, you know that right?" Kara explains carefully.  
  
Sam just looks at Kara like she's grown two heads and then laughs as she looks at Alex and says, "She's funny, that was a good one," but her laughter soon stops when she realises that neither of the sister's were laughing with her.  
  
"You are kidding right?" She asks and Kara just shakes her head "no". "How the fuck does that even work!?"  
  
"Say a woman was to go um- _Rao I can't believe I'm having this conversation right now_ \- when a woman g-goes down on... us and, golly-" Kara pauses to clear her throat and gather her confidence so that she can help Sam to understand without her irritating stuttering, "- When we come and the woman inevitably swallows it or ah, at least some of it, she can and most likely will become pregnant. Unlike humans and any other species that I know of, a female Kryptonians come contains, it doesn't contain sperm but basically the chemical equivalent. So you see I could get Lena pregnant and she could then experience pregnancy and have a biological child of her own... Do you understand?"  
  
"Well shit. I do understand, it's just hard to believe. How did I not know _that_? That's an important thing to know..." Sam says as she rubs her hands over her face.  
  
"I'm sorry babe, I thought you knew..." Alex says.  
  
"I should have known. Fucking world killers, you'd have thought Reign would have at least told me that kind of thing! Anyway, that explains why you don't stay down there when I-"  
  
"I don't need to know that!" Kara abruptly half yells to cut Sam off which causes the two other women to laugh at her.  
  
"We can talk about all that later, okay? Kara can you tell me what exactly the problem is?" Alex asks calmly.  
  
"The problem is that I don't want to just be a donor to Lena. I can give her what she wants but I just- if I did then I want to be a part of that child's life they would be mine to, you know? and I know I would see the child anyway because Lena's my bestfriend but- but Alex I don't want to be just Lena's bestfriend and I wouldn't want that child to only see me as their mothers bestfriend, if she were going to be the mother of my child I want us to do it properly, to be a family, I want to be able to be there when they hit each milestone. I want to witness their first words, their first steps. I want to be able to put them to bed and read them bedtime stories I don't want to be apart from them, I couldn't... If I got her pregnant I would want to also be that childs parent, I couldnt walk away, I couldn't just watch from the side-lines. Plus eventually she would find a girlfriend and then they would take over what should be my duty, Alex it would kill me to watch as my child calls sombody else their Jeju..." Kara rambles out her voice breaking at the end.  
  
"Didn't you talk to Lena about any of that?"  
  
"What? No of course I didn't. I don't want to ruin our friendship when she rejects me and I don't want to get her hopes up because even if she rejects being in a relationship with me I don't think I'd be able to deal with the possibility of her asking me to donate because I'm not sure I would be able to say no to her either, and then all the other things i just said would become true and-"  
  
"Kara sweetheart, I love you but you are the biggest idiot I know. That woman is in love with you too. Jeez, the way she looks at you makes me want to gag, especially when she undressed you with her eyes. She looks at you like you look at potstickers," Alex says with a small smirk.  
  
"Or the way I look at Alex... except I tend to actually undress her," Sam teases.  
  
"Kara just tell Lena how you feel. You both love each other but you are too blind to see it. You also both want children, and Lena is currently looking into getting one but settling for her second best option because she doesn't know that the woman she loves can give her the very best. You're supposed to be watching movies and eating ice cream with her now right?" Alex fondly rants, and Kara nods "yes".  
  
"So why are you still here? Get your Kryptonian arse out of my apartment and go tell that silly woman how you feel! If she turna you down I will kill - hm - I mean visit her myself," Alex says and gently pushes Kara back to the window.  
  
"...And tell her that you want her to have your babies!" Sam yells from the sofa.  
  
"You can do this Kara. Go start your family," Alex says giving Kara a comforting hug.  
  
"Go start my family... right, I can do that-" the superhero mumbles as she launches herself out of Alex's window.  
  
"Oh and Kara, let me know how it goes. Not that I have any doubt," Alex says confidently.  
  
On the flight back over to Lena's apartment Kara let's Alex and Sam's confidence fill her body. By the time she softly lands on Lena's balcony she is actually feeling pretty confident and only a medium amount nervous. Instead of just walking in, she knocks on the glass door and waits for Lena to answer.  
  
She doesn't have to wait long, after a few seconds the CEO opens the door with an easy smile.  
  
"Hey, I didn't think I'd see you again tonight, figured you'd be stuck as supergirl..."  
  
"Hey, um, about that... I didn't leave to be Supergirl, I lied, I'm sorry. I just, I needed Alex's help with something and when you assumed it was work I panicked," Kara says apologetically.  
  
Lena frowns, "O-kay... is everything alright?"  
  
"I- I think so? Uh, I need to tell you something, it's important and I don't think I can keep it from you anymore..."  
  
Lena's frown depends and she walks back to the sofa that she was sitting on. She schools her features to a neutral expression and stiffly pats the spot next to her for Kara to take which she does.  
  
"So... what is it you have to say?" Lena asks and she wonders if she really wants to know.  
  
Kara smiles sheepishly and rubs the back of her neck, "I mean it's not bad per-se, it could be for me, depending on your reaction but it could be good... I think-"  
  
"Kara," Lena prompts.  
  
"Right, sorry. I like you... like, like-like you. Rao, that's still not quite true. I am in love with you Lena," Kara finally admits with a smile, but her smile drops as she notices Lena is just staring at her blankly.

As soon as the words "I am in love with you Lena," leave Kara's mouth Lena's body stiffens even more. She tries to respond she truely does but she can't. All she can do is stare at Kara. She wants to tell Kara that she loves her too and then maybe they'd both giggle and share a sweet kiss but she can't move. She keeps trying but nothing is happening. It's like her body has gone into shock.

It was a shock. Nobody has ever told her that they love her before. Lionel did once but it sounded empty and he never tried to prove it. Lex also claimed to have loved her but then he tried to have her killed and admitted that he only said he had loved her because he felt that he should keep his friends close but his enemies closer and surprisingly it made sense that he hated her, just as his mother did.

Lena knows that Lillian is the main reason for her body to shut down though. The years she suffered whilst living woman and even afterwards were literal torture. It was drilled into her that nobody would ever love her, that she is just Lionels dirty bastard child. Hell, she had it beat into her that she was unworthy of love and that she didn't deserve such a luxury.

It was only recently that she started to get used to how touchy Kara is, how much she likes to snuggle and Lena realised that she actually liked cuddling as well, that not every touch was going to hurt her like she had grown up believing.

Words were still harder for her to deal with. She still had people call her names and other unrepeatable things. She still had the odd angry relative try to attack her every now and then due to Lex's crimes but not very often anymore. Negativity towards he she could deal with though, that's what she has grown up with.

 _Positivity_ and kind, polite comments, now that was foreign to her, she had learned to smile at it occasionally but usually she just brushed it off and forgot it happened. 

Kara telling her she loves _her_ though? She cannot just brush that off and apparently her body can't quite deal with such strong words either.

After about a minute Kara can feel her nerves come back in full force, her eyes are filling with tears and she realises Lena isn't going to reply and that she now has her confirmation that Lena doesn't like her back.  
  
The reporter chokes back the sob she wants to release and looks up at the ceiling whilst blinking back her tears and she forces herself into her Supergirl persona for a little confidence as she plays off the rejection as nothing.  
  
"H-hm," she tries to clear the lump from her throat but when she speaks her voice still comes out sounding a little strained.  
  
"You don't have to feel the same for me, I can see that you clearly don't. I'm sorry I said anything, I just thought you had a right to know. I hoped- but it doesn't matter. I just really hope that we can still be friends, I- hm, I dont want to lose you as a friend.  
  
I guess I shouldn't have listened to what Sam and Alex were telling me, shouldn't have let then get my hopes up. It doesn't matter, I just- I can live with just being your friend I just, I don't think I can lose you. I will respect your wishes if you'd rather not see me again though.  
  
Rao, why am I still talking, it embrassing. Um, yeah, I'm sorry. It's just when you mentioned the adoption but said you would prefer to experience the whole pregnancy thing and have a biological child of your own but didn't have a donor you liked, it got me thinking, I could give you that, I could give you a child and because I'm in lo- that's why I left, I needed Alex to help me think it through clearly, and I thought she had helped, she said that it was obvious you liked me back. So thought maybe I could ask you on a date and we could see what happened. I hoped I could have offered- could have given you another choice other than to adopt...  
  
Of course now I know that you don't and I really shouldn't be saying all of this, I can't stay here right now. I'm sorry, I'll um- if you decide you'd like to stay friends _please_ call me. I get it if you don't. I'm sorry I need to-" Kara's rambles but she cuts herself off as a sob breaks free from her throat. She casts one last teary glance at Lena who is still watching her but still hasn't said anything and her face is blank.  
  
Kara looks up at the ceiling once more and then leaves as fast as she can. She goes home and packs her suitcase. She posts a small letter through Alex's door telling her briefly what happened and that she will be gone for a few days maybe weeks but she doesn't say where and then she flies to the one place she hopes nobody will find her.  
  
_The Fortress of Solitude_.  
  
It's in the middle of the Arctic and she's the only one with a Key, since Kal-El didn't want anything to do with the place, so she knows that if anyone does turn up she can just get Kelex to send them away. The only person that would find her though was Lena, Kara drunkenly told her that she likes to escape to here when she gets sad... but Kara doubted she would ever show up here, not anymore.  
  
When she arrives, Kara heads straight to the room where her mother and fathers holographic projections are. Unlike Jor-El, Kara's father programmed his and Alura's projections to offer comfort if Kara ever needed it. It was actually quite impressive, it was like they were actually in the room sometimes and they were actually having a conversation. Kara loved that about her father, that he wanted to still be able to comfort her even if he wasn't physically with her and right now, she felt she needed her parents.  
  
She entered the hexagon shaped room and collapsed at the centre console, sobs racking her body.  
  
" _Kara, my darling, what's the matter_?" Her father's projection says in her native tongue and it makes her sob harder.  
  
"I- I told the woman that I love that I am in l-love with her today. She doesn't feel same way." She chokes out in between broken sobs.  
  
" _Did she tell you that cherubim?_ "  
  
"She didn't say anything. After embarrassing myself further I left. She didn't say a word, she just sat there watching me blankly," Kara explains. Her frustration and anger at herself for ruining her friendship growing.  
  
" _If you list some of this woman's personality and qualities to me, maybe I could give you a better response. My database contains much information regarding personalities and typical responses_ ," Kara's mother speaks out for the first time.  
  
"I wouldn't know where to start. She is amazing. She's kind, smart, funny, witty. She was treated badly by her family as she grew up. Her mother died when she was 4 so she was adopted by the Luthors, her adoptive mother mistreated her, used to degrade her constantly, hit her sometimes, tell her she wasn't good enough. Mentally, emotionally and physically abused her I guess.  
  
Her adoptive father, who she later found out was actually her biological father loved her but was rarely around and even when he was he wouldnt protect her against Lillian. He didn't have much of a backbone when it came to that woman. Then there was Lex, her brother. They were as thick as thieves when they were children but when he grew up he went insane and teamed up with his mother to kill her. Too many times and they almost succeeded _twice_.  
  
She's been doing fine the past year and a half though, she's made a few friends, her company is more than successful and she is still kind and brilliant and beautiful. Father, she is so strong and caring. I couldn't not fall in love with her. At first she was just Lena, my best friend but I couldn't stop myself from wanting more, from falling for her. She is irresistible and it feels like I am just a simple moth drawn to her bright, incredible flame.  
  
She wants a child. That's why I told her how I felt tonight. I love her and I could have given her one, or as many as she wanted. Mother I would have given her the world. I could literally give her a world, I have a liquid geo and a world engine I'd just have to find an uninhabitable planet and we could create a new Krypton or whatever she would want to call it, it would be hers.  
  
...Why can't she love me back? What's wrong with me, I must have hurt her, I must have done something wrong, maybe she just doesn't like me like that. I can't blame her, I'm a reporter, I bet that put her off too, maybe she only keeps me around because I know too much about her and she's just worried I'll leak all of her secrets..."  
  
" _Don't get ahead of yourself cherubim. My database points out that this woman you speak of has been through a lot of trauma growing up. You said her mother made her feel unworthy and oftan hurt her and she lost her brother to illness._  
  
_Maybe you took her by surprise, maybe she was just trying to process what you had told her... or maybe you are right and she isn't romantically interested in you my child_."  
  
"Maybe. You didn't see her face though, she didn't look surprised or even remotely happy. I think it's just me. I'm the problem, I'm the one not good enough for her, Rao she deserves so much better than me,"  
  
" _Kara Zor-El, you are the last daughter of Krypton, heir to the house of El, you would have been the top student in both the science and the art guilds. Your aunt even believed that you would conquer the military guild. You are worthy, don't ever think other wise!_ " The blondes father's projection chastises. Kara scoffs at the fact a  _projection_ just reprimanded her.  
  
"That was on Krypton! Here I am a nobody! I am not top or heir of anything! Im just so angry at myself for screwing everything up, again! I even failed the one mission you gave me, I failed to raise Kal-El. The only difference is this time it is all my fault and aahhHHh!" Kara shouts angrily and her next sob she releases along with the heatvision that had been building up behind her eyes.  
  
As Kara's anger slowly fades away she curls up on the floor, her parents projections choosing to stay silent as the superheroine cries herself to sleep as her exhaustion takes it's hold.

* * *

As Alex reads Kara's letter she begins to feel incredibly guilty. She also feels angry that the Luthor obviously hurt her sister.  
  
"Fuck!" Alex curses as she slams her fist on the worktop.  
  
"What's up?" Sam asks.  
  
"Kara's gone. She said that her talk with Lena didn't go well, pretty much says that she made an arse of herself and embarrassed herself more by rambling and not being able to stop herself. Which means she literally told Lena every thought that was going through her head the second she thought it.  
  
She said that she needs some time to herself, needs to get away because she felt national city was suffocating her. She didn't say where she went or when or she'll be back. Just that she can't be here but if I need her for a world-ending emergency to call her and she'll come back..."  
  
"Shit. Obviously didn't go as well as we thought it would then. I don't get why though, it was only a few months ago Lena admitted to me that she was in love with Kar-" Sam is interrupted by her phone vibrating. "Wait a minute, it's Lena..." Sam says holding up a finger as she presses the answer button and lifts the phone to her ear.  
  
"Lena?"  
  
" _Sam, I fucked up. I froze, I couldn't say anything, I didn't, I- god she- the pain in her eyes. Sam I- need to put this right, I need to talk to-_ "  
  
"Lena, Kara's gone. She left and she didn't say where she went or when or even if she'd be back... She left Alex a note, said she needed some space that she felt suffocated here. Alex doesn't know where she could have gone," Sam tells Lena.  
  
Sam waits a moment for Lenas response but it doesn't come, instead there's a thud. She strains her hearing and she can just about hear sniffling before a broken sob sounds down the phone and her heart breaks for her friend.  
  
She looks over to see Alex looking at her with a mixed expression made up of curiosity and a little anger so she puts the phone on speaker. After a few seconds she mites the call so that Lena can't hear her.  
  
"She panicked and froze. She didn't reject her like Kara thinks she did..."  
  
"Shit. I'll check Kara's apartment, I doubt she'll be there as she knows that's the first place I'd look and she said that she felt suffocated by national city but I have to look anyway, I have to be sure before I think if somewhere else she could have gone. I'll get Winn to try track her phone, I'll get James and Lucy and M'gann and Sara to help look for her. She's got to be here somewhere, this is a mess." Alex says as she grabs her phone and her keys, already dialing numbers as she leaves the apartment.  
  
"Right. I'll go and calm Lena down then. Good plan Danvers!" Sam says to herself and the now empty apartment.  
  
"You seem to have forgotten that she is an alien that can fly and could be in literally any country in the world,"  
  
"Lena, I'm coming over, unlock your front door for me or I'll break it down." She says firmly, knowing that Lena won't listen to her unless she threatens her to do it.  
  
Sam had never been more thankful that she still had her Kryptonian powers after she was separated from Reign. It was lucky because if she didn't get them, Reign would have and that would have been extremely bad for everyone.  
  
She quickly puts on an oversized hoodie and then jumps out the window. Her flight at first was a little bumpy and she still isn't used to using her powers but she got the hang of it. She supposed it was reassuring knowing that if she fell, she would survive and get away with a banging headache and maybe a broken bone depending how high she fell from.  
  
It takes her five minutes to reach Lena's apartment and she lets herself in. She finds Lena sipping, or more like gulping, wine. Literally from the bottle and slumped on the floor with her back against the sofa.  
  
Great. Lena better not be drunk otherwise this is going to be the most tedious job in the world.  
  
Alex meets up with the others outside Kara's apartment building and explains what's happened and that they need to find Kara.

"I'll get my mother to check Kara's favourite places in Midvale," Alex says to Lucy.  
  
"Okay, we will all split up and check everywhere in national city. We'll find her Alex, I promise," the short military officer promised.  
  
Alex nods and then calls Eliza. As suspected Kara's apartment was pointless checking, although she did notice that Kara's suitcase and half of her wardrobe was missing which just filled her with even more dread. She texted the others to let them know. She knows it's likely Kara's skipped the country but she can't seem to think of one of significance to Kara.  
  
" _Hello?_ " Alex hears as her mother answers her call.  
  
"Hey mum, don't panic but Kara's missing. She had a misunderstanding with Lena but she doesn't know it was a misunderstanding yet and she's hurt and upset and she's left. Can you check midvale to see if she's hiding your end?"  
  
" _What do you mean don't panic? Define missing? Kara hasn't disappeared since she was a teenager..._ "  
  
"She's not at her apartment, her suitcase was missing and her wardrobe was almost empty. She left me a note saying she had to leave for a bit but she didn't say if she was going to come back or where she had gone. She said to call if there was a world ending emergency but it didn't exactly seem like she was leaving for just a few days. I'm worried mum, I don't know where to find her, I've got every body out looking for her but we are all coming up empty, I don't know where else to look," Alex says as tears start to fall down her cheeks.  
  
" _Oh sweetheart, I don't understand what's happened. Kara came back last time, I'm sure she will come back when she is ready, she'll miss her sister too much to stay away. Just give her some time to figure out whatever it is that she needs to work through. If nobody has heard anything from her after a few days we can start worrying then but she left you a note so it's not like she left without telling anybody..._  
  
_Is Lena okay?_ "

* * *

"I thought It was all one-sided and then she told me she liked me and then she said that wasn't true either and that she is in love with me," Lena half explains.  
  
It took Sam about an hour to get the younger girl to calm down after she confiscated the wine although she did down a few mouthfuls before putting the cork back in and storing it in the fridge (She would have tipped it away but she knows Lena doesn't buy cheap wine and she wasn't about to wash a good few thousand dollars by pouring it away.) out of Lena's way.  
  
She had just found a hoodie in Lena's wardrobe that she recognised as Kara's and had handed it to the smaller brunette.  
  
Lena immediately put it on and snuggled into it as she desperately tried to feel close to Kara. God, she feels awful, her body just froze, she tried to move, to tell Kara that she loves her too but she couldn't. It wasn't until about 5 minutes after she helplessly watched Kara trying to hold back her heartbreak as she left that she broke down in tears herself.  
  
Honestly, she wants a child yet as soon as the woman she's been pining for for the past year tell her she's in love with her she chokes. What kind of mother would that make her?  
  
_Oh_. Kara said that she would have given her a child in her heartbroken ramble. Lena is currenmy unsure of exactly what Kara meant by she could give Lena a child but the love of her life had said that he would, and that just hurt Lena more.  
  
She feels angry at herself, if she is honest angry doesn't even begin to cover how she feels right now. She literally just shattered her own heart into tiny indiscernible pieces. As for Kara's, she knows she completely obliterated it.  
  
That happy yet nervous smile Kara had on her face when Lena first answered the balcony door is what keeps cutting at Lena right now. She feels mostly numb, especially after half a bottle of rather expensive wine that had been aged for over 100 years but the image of that hope on her face is killing Lena because she just sat there.  
  
Now she is sat in the same spot she froze in earlier explaining to Sam what happened, she explained most of it but some of it she couldn't word properly, whatever she said didn't sound right so they are currently stuck in a moment of silence.  
  
The silence didn't last long as Sam's phone began to vibrate.  
  
"Alex, how's it going?" She asks her girlfriend.  
  
" _She's not here. She's not anywhere, I don't know where else to look, mum has just searched midvale with my dad but she isn't there either. Sh-she's gone sam..._ "  
  
"I don't know what to suggest, I don't know anyone who knows Kara better than you..."  
  
" _Me either. I'll have to keep thinking. How's Luthor?_ "  
  
"A guilty, heartbroken mess of gay."  
  
" _Shit, that just makes me worry more about Kara... Will you be home tonight?_ "  
  
Sam glances at Lena and sighs.  
  
"Probably not babe, sorry. If you need someone to stop you from going crazy kidnap Lucy,"  
  
" _Okay, well, I love you, keep me updated._ " Alex says and hangs up. Before putting her phone down Sam quickly sends Alex a text message telling her she loves her too and to try and get some sleep.  
  
"So... uh, nobody can find or get hold of Kara," Sam announces slowly.  
  
Lena just looks lost as she look from Sam down to her hands, she sniffles a few times but she doesn't have any tears left to cry.  
  
"None of this would have happened if I'd have just told her how I felt, if I hadn't frozen. She would probably be here with me still and we would be cuddling, my head on her shoulder watching a Disney movie I haven't seen before like we normally do..." Lena mumbles. "Why am I like this Sam? Why do I trying everything and hurt the people I care about?" She whispers.  
  
"Sweetie you aren't helping anybody with that sort of thinking. Once we find Kara you can tell her how you feel, if you can't then I will tell her for you whilst you sit and nod to everything I say. Or, you can write her a letter explaining everything you've every wanted to tell her," Sam says as she pulls Lena into a comforting hug. "I promise, when she gets back Kara will let you explain. She said she still wanted to be you friend right? She'll come back to you, she's just upset and wanting a little time to deal with that right now," 

"What if she comes back and she doesn't love me anymore? What if I have ruined my chances?" 

"If Kara is in love with you it's going to take a while to get over you, especially considering you're...  _you._ Seriously Lena, when she is apart from you, you are basically the only person she talks about, and as much as I love you it gets tedious sometimes, _"Oh-My-Rao, Alex! You should see Lena in the mornings before she's had her coffee, she's so grumpy is adorable!"._ Nobody thinks you are adorable when you are grumpy, even I try to avoid your grumpiness, it's the third most scariest thing in the world and that weird ray of sunshine thinks it's cute. She will be back and she will forgive you," 

"I have snapped at her multiple times and she actually has to force herself not to laugh. I have made grown men cry by snapping at them... Sam if you're wrong, if she doesn't come back, who's going to laugh at me when I'm angry? I can't even stay mad at her for laughing, the sound is infectious..." 

"Yes well, going back to the first part of my pep talk... listening to you talk about Kara all of the time is tedious to," Sam says playfully nudging Lena. "Come on, I need sleep."

* * *

 Kara woke up to Kel-Ex repairing the damage that she had done the night before with her heat vision. She sits up and rubs her eyes in confusion before her memories from the day before come rushing back.

_Lena doesn't want me._

Kara sighs sadly and picks herself up off of the ground in search for some food in the kitchen she built into the fortress. After a quick egg and bacon sandwich she walks back out to the centre console and does a quick security check out of habit before walking to the equipment room.

She has been working on a Kryptonian pistol for Alex over the past few years. When she first started fixing it up and improving it the trigger was broken and the bullet chamber was jammed. The power was completely messed up too, it barely had enough of a blast to knock a small can over.

Now it is in fully working condition, she has polished the metal to the point it practically glows and it is more powerful than it was originally. Now it contains the same amount of power in one blast as the Kryptonian rifle. She has also modified it so that if she ever needs to be taken down due to red kryptonite poisoning or something, all Alex has to do is press the button on the side and the bullet will fill with fill with the equivalent radiation of a red sun so the normal blast will knock her out long enough for them to capture and restrain her. 

The normal blast however is only to be used on other aliens, it will immediately knock them out and incapacitate them for multiple hours. If a human takes a hit from this gun then... they're dead.

Thankfully Alex doesn't often come into contact with human criminals so there shouldn't be any thing to worry about.

Kara greases the trigger mechanisms and the bullet chamber and then decides to work on another of her projects, her red sun necklace.

Sometimes she just wants to be human, and right now, that's exactly what she wants.

It doesn't take her long to have the main core stabilised, the problem she is having is forming an indestructible crystal shell to hold protect it.

At least she has something to do that will keep her occupied for a few days. Maybe then she will go home, live her life as a human for a while. It's not like National City needs her. The Legion, Guardian and J'onn are more than capable of dealing with any alien attacks. If it weren't for her job at CatCo, Kara would just stay at the fortress for a but longer but unfortunately she cares about her job, even if it will be more difficult without her powers.

* * *

"Sam it has been 3 days and we haven't heard a thing. I'm worried about her," Alex says as she paces her kitchen like she has been almost constantly since Kara left.

"Babe she is a grown woman and _Supergirl,_ she is going go be absolutely fine, wherever she is!" 

"Yeah but what if she's not? What if she has been captured by ex cadmus people? Or if she has fallen and hurt herself on kryptonite!" 

"Alex I really think you need to calm do-" Sam starts but stops midsentence, concentrating on the familiar heartbeat coming up in the elevator, a smile breaking out onto her face, "I really think you need to open the front door..." 

Alex frowns at her but walks over to the front door just as there is a soft knock. She opens the door and freezes for a second before launching herself at her infuriating sister.

"Where the fuck have you been Kara!?" Alex yells angrily although she is mostly feeling relieved.

"Yeah bitch, you had us all worried. Where have you been Alex has been driving me crazy!"

Kara sighs, "I went away. I needed to get away for a few days, clear my head. I told you you didn't need to worry..." 

"You disappeared Kara! Of course I was worried, especially after Lena called Sam in tears," 

Kara looks at the floor awkwardly as Alex reprimanded her. Then as soon as Lena's name is mentioned she flinches. The pain of her unwanted feelings hitting her once again. She clears her throat and blinks away the tears that had built up before she speaks.

"Hm- I-is she okay?" She asks sadly.

"You should speak to her and find out yourself. After you had me so worried I am not doing you any favours. I love you Kara but I am pissed that you did this again. I even had mum search Midvale!" Alex chides once more. 

"Kara... as angry and worried as I was, I missed you," she says pulling her sister into a tight hug.

"I missed you too... I figured you would be mad at me too, so I brought you a present. I fixed and improved it myself, I was hoping bribery would make you less mad," Kara says truthfully as she pulls away from Alex who just watches her in confusion.

Kara smiles sheepishly and pulls a box the size of a shoebox out of her bag and hands it to the agent.

Alex takes the box over to the table and slides the lid off to see a load of bubble wrap to which she just gives Kara an unimpressed look, the younger Danvers knowing that the stuff irritates her immensely. After she has unwrapped the gift she gasps in awe.

"Kara... What is this?" 

Kara smiles to herself, happy that the weapon had the desired effect on her sister.

"That is a Kryptonian pistol. The last pistol of Krypton that I am aware of. I modified it a bit, made it more powerful, but I also made it so should I ever get poisoned by red K again or for some reason need taking down, you just press- ... that button there, and a single bullet will be infused with the radiation of a red sun which will enable you to get close enough to detain me but not actually kill me. Obviously if you need more that one bullet just press the button again..." Kara laughs awkwardly.

"...Also, it's made from lightweight promethium making the casing almost impossible to destroy. The gun is ideally only to be used on aliens, it will hit them with enough force to completely knock them out... unless of course it's me you are shooting to which I'd probably just laugh, however if you shoot a human with that, it will kill them instantly." She tells her sister with a grimace.

"I can modify a scope if you'd like one, in the right hands it can fire long distance, up to about maybe 3 to 4 miles? I'm sure you can test that more accurately. The bullets are easily replaced, just tell me when you need some more... oh! I almost forgot, I need to set the fingerprint to you so only you can use it, security measure for if the wrong hands get hold of it, if they do then it will probably electrocute them and send out a signal to you. I haven't exactly tested that part yet, figured I'd have to leave something for you to do, considering there's literally nothing else you can do with it... sorry about that, I know you like to play," 

"Kara- you've just given me a pistol with the range of a sniper rifle, made from the rarest material on earth, its lightweight, made so only I can use it and it's pretty much a one shot take down. This is... you are 100% forgiven for worrying me, I'll even buy you a pizza!" Alex says, excitement and happiness radiating off of her as she continues to admire her new weapon.

Kara grins and winks at Sam, "Cool, what do I get if I fix up the rifle I have as well?" 

Alex grapes at Kara incredulously, "You're kidding?" 

"Nope. Definitely does need some repairs though.." Kara tells her now somehow even more excited sister.

"Kara, my favourite sister, my sweet, sweet darling sister... if you were to let me help you fix that rifle, I will give you anything and everything you could ever want." Alex replies with the biggest puppy eyes and pout Kara and Sam have ever seen.

"Oh jeez, that is the cutest, most ridiculous thing I have ever seen!" Sam says as she almost doubles over laughing.

"Anything and everything?" Kara asked mischievously.

"Anything and everything." Alex promises.

"So... if I wanted Sam, I can have her? You'd give me your girlfriend..." Kara says with a wide smirk, which only grows as Alex looks between Kara and Sam, clearly conflicted.

"Oh-my-god. Are you actually considering giving me to your sister!?" Sam asks wondering whether she should be amused or annoyed.

"I'm sorry but you know guns are my weakness babe, come on, it's not like we wouldn't see each other..." Alex teases. They think...

"You know what, if you're more interested in a gun that me, I'm all yours _Supergirl_ , do with me as you will I'm sure you will care more for me than a weapon!" Sam says feigning hurt as she walks over to Kara and wraps her arms around her neck playfully.

Kara grins at her sister, and she feels proud of herself because never, never has she been able to tease Alex like this, and oh how she is enjoying her payback and she plans to take full advantage as she remember when Alex went as far as to kiss her ex girlfriend Lucy, of course she knew they were playing but now it's her turn.

She bends down, picking Sam up bridle style, still watching her sister, "Oh I'm sure I can find something for us to do Miss Arias, you know I've been a pretty naughty superhero recently, damaged a few buildings and what not, you still believe in justice right?" 

Alex watches in horror as she watches her sister flirt with her girlfriend. She knows she's playing, her sister is in love with Lena for a start, and suddenly she feels guilt build up in her stomach for all of the times her and Lucy purposely wound Kara up.

Sam grins as she plays along, getting back at Alex for actually having to think about swapping her for a gun.

"Really Supergirl, maybe I should punish you then, you know, cuffs an all," 

"Oh fuck, nope! Kara you can have anything else but put my girlfriend down. Those cuffs are only to be used on me and you-" she says now pointing at Sam, "-if you don't get out of my sister's arms right now, I will pout and I will never let you use your to-" 

"Hey! Supergirl, put me down please, as nice as it is feeling your muscles, I can't go without your sister's va-"

"Okay, nope. Don't need to hear the end of that. I can flirt and tease but not about my sister's... parts. Ew," Kara says cringing.

"Aw, so you can flirt with my girlfriend about using her cuffs on you but you can't handle it when somebody talks about me sexually in return," Alex teases.

* * *

"Okay so now Alex has stopped admiring her new toy, how are you doing Kara?" Sam asks the blonde woman as they each take a sip of their drinks.

Kara sighs sadly and takes to watching the steam rise from her mug.

"I don't know if I'm honest. I almost blew out my powers the night I left. I just felt so sad, disappointed, useless and angry. My mother and father didn't help but it's not their fault. So after that emotional outburst I haven't thought about  _her_ or what happened and I plan to keep it that way. I have no intention of going near her, I don't think I have the strength.

Kryptonians only have one mate, and I truelly believe that she is mine, my father's projection even said that she would have been a perfect match. So uh, knowing that the woman I fell for doesn't want me is... hard, but I'll survive I suppose," 

Alex looks at Sam and shakes her head fondly. Her sister is certainly dramatic sometimes, if she had waited a little while before she disappeared she would already know that Lena is just as hurt.

"Kara..." Sam starts, "Lena didn't reject you," she tells her carefully.

"Yes, she did. I told her how I felt, I told her everything and she just stared at me, she completely ignored me and let me make a fool of myself and she didn't try to stop me leaving either. If that's not rejection then I don't know what is," Kara says angrily.

 _Seriously_ , Kara thinks to herself,  _how is that not a rejection? An unnecessarily insensitive one at that, she could have just said that she didn't like me that way and that she just wants to stay friends._

Instead the youngest Luthor let Kara flail and ramble and thoroughly embarrass herself without saying a single word.

"We know what she did Kara, and it wasn't a nice thing for you to have to go through but after you left, Lena called me in hysterics. She is a complete mess," Sam informs the frowning blonde.

"If you had of stayed for a bit longer instead of going into hiding, you would know this already and saved the both of you a lot of pain." Alex continues.

"Lena panicked. Said she tried to respond but her body wouldn't let her, she loves you too Kara, that silly woman just struggled to process what you were telling her. Just remember nobody has told her that they love her and want her babies before and instead she is used to death threats and deprecation. So she panicked. Honestly, I stayed with her that night and she barely slept a wink, she refused to eat more than a mouthful of food, and even when she did finally sleep it was because she cried into one of your old hoodies.

I have never seen her so torn. Now that you are back and you have bribed your sister's anger away, you need to go and see Lena. You need to sort things out, she's had time to process and she knows now what it feels like to lose you, I very much doubt she will let you go again. Hell I think she might even chain herself to you," Sam says ending her ramble with a laugh. 

At first the supeheroin just sits there with a few tears sliding down her cheeks. Then she feels guilt build up in her stomach and even more sadness on top of it.

If she hadn't of been so dramatic and had just cried herself to sleep in her apartment or gone out and drank away her pain then she would already know this, Rao, she could have already fixed this.

"You're not lying to me?" 

"Oh please, Lena's my bestfriend and the only thing I hate dealing with more than an angry Lena is a sad, self loathing one. If dragging you over there myself cheers that silly cow up then I will, so there, you either get that pretty little butt of your up and over there to kiss that woman's face off now or I will forcefully drag you by your ears," Sam playfully threatens the younger Danvers sister.

Kara's eyes widen, obviously taking the threat a little more seriously than what it was intended to be and jumps to her feet.

"Alex, I'm leaving again. I'll see you later!" She says as she literally dives out of the open sitting room window.

"I can't believe you flirted with my sister," Alex says when Sam finally meets her eyes.

"I can't believe you actually considered trading me for alien weaponry," Sam replies with a smug grin.

* * *

 

After Kara left Alex and Sam's flat she flew straight to Lena's. It wasn't until she had subconsciously knocked on the door that she realised how nervous she felt.

Her stomach is filled with dread and her feet feel like blocks of lead and her throat is thick with emotion. When the door doesn't open after a few minutes she scans the apartment with her x-ray vision to make sure the littlest Luthor is actually home.

She is. She seems to be just sitting on her sofa. Kara can hear that the apartment is silent so Lena must be either reading or just sitting there doing nothing, so Kara knocks again, a little harder this time.

The raven haired woman didn't even budge, not so much as a flinch. So Kara tried the door handle expecting it to be locked as it should be but she is mistaken. The front door opened effortlessly, and Kara took a slow and cautious step in and shutting it behind her.

"I told you I would be fine Sam, you can go home," the woman on the sofa says in a defiant tone.

"Not Sam..." Is all the hero says. 

As soon as the words leave her mouth the CEOs head snaps round to her so fast even she'd have missed it had she of blinked.

"Kara..." The woman breathes out. After she has literally pinched herself she launches herself off of the sofa and straight at Kara.

Lena forces herself to stop about a metre away from kara, her heart racing and her eyes blinking rapidly to keep her tears at bay.

Kara across from her is also trying not to let her tears fall but when she takes in the state of the other woman she can't help but let one or two escape. In case Sam was wrong Kara doesn't move closer to Lena and with the heavy lump in her throat that she cannot seem to swallow down she is unable to say anything either.

"Kara..." Lena starts again. "I am so sorry. I'm sorry," she whimpers, her arms wrapping around her waist as she tries to hold herself together. What she wants is to wrap then around Kara but she is unsure of whether the blonde even wants her touch anymore.

Kara clears her throat a few times, she looks up at the ceiling to gather herself before forcing herself to speak.

"Hm, S-sam said uh- you um- d-didn't, I didnt- hm. Sam said I should come s-see you..." she stutters out brokenly.

"I um, hm. I wasn't going to at first, I had planned to, hm- to avoid you at all costs," the blonde pauses to smile weakly at the brunette. "I d-didn't think you'd want to see me again so... but um, Sam said y-you uh, that you wanted to, so what am I doing here Lena? Because if it's just to tell me verbally that you don't want me, I'm not sure I could deal with- hm, I don't- I-" Kara stops herself as a small choked sob falls from her throat.

Unable to keep to herself any longer leans pulls the blonde into what would have been a bone crushing embrace had Kara been human.

"I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry. Please forgive me, I'm sorry, I didn't reject you Kara, god you have no idea how much I love you, I'm so sorry," Lena begs. Kara just wraps her arms around Lena as she continues to cry, too over come by her emotions to respond just yet.

10 minutes later finds both of the hopeless women cuddled up in a heap on the floor, both unable to cry anymore tears. Kara speaks first.

"You said you love me..." she whispers.

Lena lets out a single broken laugh, "I do, so so much darling. I'm so sorry I hurt you. I promise I didn't mean to I just- I couldn't get myself to say anything, it's like I could hear you and I was trying so hard to tell you I wanted you too but nothing was coming out and then when you left everything started working again but you had already gone and I thought I was too late then Sam said you'd disappeared and then it hurt so much and I only had myself to blame. I'm sorry Kara, I'm begging you, please forgive me, don't tell me I've ruined my chances. I can't lose you, tell me I haven't lost you..." 

"I'm here aren't I? If you want me, I'm right here. If you want me, I'm yours. Always have been, even if you don't want me I'd still be yours. I chose you, couldn't change that even if I wanted to... Tell me you want me Lena, say the words and I'll give you everything I am," Kara pleads.

"I do, I want you Kara" 

"You do? You're 100% sure?" 

"100%" 

Kara smiles weakly, "Can I- can I kiss you?" 

"Please," Lena says as she wets her lips with her tongue.

So Kara kisses her. She pours every emotion into it, she only breaks apart to tell Lena that she loves her before passionately kissing the shorter woman again, and Lena, she responds with just as much love and passion.

Unfortunately it isn't long until she desperately needs to breathe, with burning lungs she sadly forces herself to pull away but only far enough to gather herself. Instead she rests her forehead on Kara's as they both breathe heavily.

"I've wanted to do that for far too long," Lena pants out.

"What stopped you?" Kara asks.

"Would you believe that I was too nervous? I didn't think you even liked me this way, not really, not until a few days ago when you admitted it," 

"I think after today I can just about believe that you were nervous. I need you to know I meant everything I said the other night," 

"Even the part about you wanting a child with me?" 

"Especially that part. You are it for me Lena. On Krypton the matrix chooses our mates and that mate, like them or not, is your partner for life. Kryptonians only have one soul mate, for me that's you. That's why it hurt so much when I thought you rejected me, It was like I'd lost Krypton all over again. I'll do everything I can to make you happy. Even if that meant giving you up. You are my everything." Kara declares.

"God you are so special Kara Zor-El. I will do everything I can to make sure that you are happy too, I promise." 

"I trust you," 

"Thank you," 

After a few more kisses and a few more promises the get off of the floor and move to the sofa where this whole mess started.

"So the reason any of this even happened was because you told me you wanted a baby... You said you would like one of your own but never had a suitable donor, maybe- uh, do you maybe want to 're talk about that?" Kara asks awkwardly.

"If you're sure..." 

"I am, I'd like to talk about it again, I hope maybe this time the conversation might go in a better direction," 

"Okay well your statement a second ago was correct. I would like one of my own, I don't have an issue with adopting and I wouldn't treat an adopted child any different to one of my own but I- I like the idea of actually being pregnant, I want to have the whole experience you know? But as you said, I don't have a suitable donor," 

"Right... except that you do. I can give you that experience Lena, if you want it," Kara says nervously.

"How? Are you... do you have- is it different down there for Kryptonians?" Lena asks, her face turning a deep shade of red.

Kara forced herself not to laugh, "We are maybe a little different, instead of what human females have down... there... Kyptonian women have this little tentacle thing, it's kind of like a noodle. We are mostly the same but where you have your clitoris, we have the little tentacle, it is honestly tiny like maybe just under half a centimetre?" 

"So that's the only different part about down there? What does that thing do exactly?" Lena asks clearly buying Kara's bullshit and genuinely considering this and that makes it all the more difficult to keep from laughing.

"Well for me nothing, it is solely for fertilizing another woman's eggs. So I've never actually used it myself but back at the science guild on Krypton we were taught that the excrete some kind of fluid like a human man would and the fertilisation works basically the same way," 

"Right. That's not quite as bad as what I had first imagined..." 

"So... would you let me be your donor?" Kara asks barely holding it together.

Lena thinks for a moment longer before looking at Kara, "I mean it's something I could probably get used to, it doesn't sound that different or unpleasant exactly, but I would only accept if you would help me raise the child. If you want a relationship with me then I couldn't possibly accept you to just donate, you'd have to be willing to help raise the child..." 

"Of course, so that's a yes?" 

"That's a yes. But only if you are certain Kara, if you change your mind afterwards, I won't abort, you could leave but I won't abort," 

"I wouldn't leave you Lena." Kara says sincerely, all jokes put aside momentarily.

"Then I guess I would accept your offer," 

And that's it for Kara, Lena completely believing that she has a little tentacle and would be willing to still sleep with her finally pushes her over the edge and she can't help but let out a mischievous giggle.

Lena's confusion is instantaneous, "What's got you laughing?" 

"I'm sorry-" Kara says laughing a little more.

"For what exactly?" Lena says a little defensively. They were having a serious conversation so she isn't quite sure why the blonde is laughing.

"I may have been pulling your leg a little... I um, I don't actually have a tentacle, I just, I wanted to see if you'd actually consider it if I was all weird down there and..." Kara glances at Lena who is narrowing her eyes at Kara and Kara gulps, humour gone immediately. "... And now I see that it wasn't f-funny at all. I'm sorry. Please don't look at me like that, I promise that was the only part I lied about. I-its completely normal down there, no weird surprises j-just normal and oh- no, no, please don't raise your- _fuck_. I'm sorry Lena, I'm-" 

This time it's Lena that bursts out laughing, "Your face! Oh my god that's picture perfect, aha!" 

"You're not- you're not actually mad are you?" 

"Oh darling, of course not your poker face is terrible. You were trying not to laugh throughout that whole spiel. In all seriousness though, because you are you and I am in love with you, if you were actually a little odd down below I would still have given you a chance. Not just because you could give me a child but because I want to be with you, no matter what you look like. The fact that you look like a goddess is certainly a bonus but it is your personality that I fell in love with," 

"Rao- you are just... you are perfect Lena Luthor, truelly perfect!" Kara tells her friend as she pulls her in for another kiss.

After a few moments Lena pulls away again.

"So in all seriousness, you're normal down there, the same as me?" 

"Yes, the same as you" Kara says with a chuckle.

"The only difference is instead of periods we get a become fertile, if I were to come, and you were to swallow some of the fluid, or I was to use my fingers to place some inside of you, you could get pregnant. Our - it's not sperm but our version of it which looks like the same fluid you release after an orgasm by the way - is stronger than a human males. You are basically guaranteed to get pregnant..." Kara explains.

"I see. So during your "period" we will have to be careful..." 

"Yes. But as long as you don't swallow or get any Inside you, everything would still be the same, unlike you I wouldn't have to abstain for a week. I mean not that you have to, I guess you could still you know... and if you needed help then, Rao, I guess, uh-" 

"I understand Kara and I wouldn't ask you to do anything during that time. We are distressing I think... so you are serious about donating?" 

"Of course! I mean sort of... I can't donate if you don't want me in the child's life, I want to be just as much a parent to them as you. If for whatever reason you decide to end things with me in the future I would still expect you to let me see the child and in turn I would obviously still help provide and pay for things he or she may need, but I can't be an absent parent, I won't abandon our child. Ever, and that includes you, if we split I would still always be around to help and be there for you if you needed me," 

"I would never stop you from being a part of our child's life so you don't have to worry about that and you will be every bit of the parent that I am, I told you, if you want a relationship with me, you have to be ready to step up to the plate with me," Lena says reassuringly.

"I am, I promise. I think maybe, as much as I would like to start straight away, I think maybe I would like to take you on a few official dates first, I want to make sure this relationship is just as important to you as it is me, I want to make you feel special and wanted by me and to do that I think putting in a bit of effort to prove that is important... So uh, Lena Luthor, will you please go on a few dates with me before we make a baby together?"

"Kara Zor-El I would be honoured."   


End file.
